Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I hope you have a very thankful day. This year, as always, I am thankful that I am a parrot and not a turkey. I am also thankful that I am not a dumb robin or some other outside bird hungrily poking around in the cold snow in case I might happen to find a piece of rotten fruit or a stray seed or some other tiny tidbit to eat but instead live inside in a nice warm cage with a full food dish even though my people don't let me out of the cage all the time but sometimes make me stay in there even when I want to get out and sit on their shoulders and bite their ears even though they are busy doing something else and then when I start squawking in protest, they shut the door to my room. But it's still a lot nicer than having to live outside in the cold snow and not have any people to love and feed you.

New Parrot Poetry

Although I am the poet in the family, my person also likes to try her hand at poetry writing from time to time. Some of her work is not too bad. Today I'd like to share one of my favorite poems by my person:

The Parrot

(with apologies to Edgar Allen Poe)

Once upon a morning dreary, while I glanced with eye so leery

Over many a crumbled cracker scattered on the once-clean floor

Suddenly I heard some talking, no I didn’t, it was squawking,

Yes, it was the parrot squawking: Polly wants crackers! She wants more!

Once my days were calm and quiet, there was no fuss, there was no riot,

But that was then, those long-gone days without a bird that came before.

Now my life is filled with screeching, parrot begging, bird beseeching,

With that phrase she’s oft heard shrieking: Polly wants crackers! She wants more!

Once my house was clean and polished, all intact, nothing demolished,

Crumbs picked up and dirt all gone, swept neatly out the kitchen door.

Now my things are all a-scatter, pencils chewed and books a-tatter,

And there is that constant chatter: Polly wants crackers! She wants more!

Now my back is always aching, picking up the mess she’s making.

Sweeping up a parrot’s clutter is a never-ending chore.

As I clean I hear it loud, the voice with which she’s been endowed,

As she announces, oh so proud: Polly wants crackers! She wants more!

Though I gripe, I often  ponder: Of this bird I can’t be fonder,

She makes a mess but she’s so cute, this little bird that I adore

A silent house might well disturb me, and I’m sure it would perturb me
No more to hear (it would unnerve me): Polly wants crackers! She wants more!

Lunchtime

Lunchtime is a very nice time of day. It's especially nice when you share it with your loved ones. Here's a picture of me enjoying a lunchtime peanut butter sandwich with my step person:

By the way, do you know how to eat a peanut butter sandwich? The best way is to start from the underside of the bread and eat your way through until you almost reach the peanut butter. Then you leave the peanut butter part for someone else to eat. Leave the crust for them, too, then go off and look for another piece of bread and start all over again. Also, be sure to leave lots of crumbs all over the table.

Scary Neighborhood

This neighborhood is full of predators. I can't understand why my people chose to live here.

First of all there are these scary monsters that come by every week or so. They run all over the lawns roaring and eating grass, but just because they eat grass doesn't mean that they wouldn't also want to take a bite out of a tasty parrot who just happened to be by the window.

Those are the regular predators but there are other ones that drop by occasionally. Like today there were these big scary ladders leaning up against the house across the street and every once in a while, completely without warning, they would move to another place and lean up against the house there. For all I know they were planning to come over here later on and lean up against this house just in case they might find a tasty parrot inside. I had to spend all day watching those scary things and warning my people with loud squawks every time the monsters moved.

You know, I don't know what my people would do without me to protect them. First of all, they moved to this dangerous place, and then they act as if it's completely safe. So I'm really busy a lot of the time warning them that danger is near.

New Home

First, I would like to apologize to all my fans for neglecting you all summer. I am very sorry, but my person kept me very busy all summer long. She decided to move, who knows why, so I had to help her with the packing. My responsibility was to sit on her shoulder or in my cage and keep an eye on her while she put things in boxes. I tell you, it was exhausting work, and it was especially disconcerting when she started packing up the things in my room. Every day more things would disappear into boxes, and I wondered if I would ever see them again.

Well, thank goodness, that ordeal is over and we are now settled in our new home. Though I can't figure out what the purpose of all the upheaval was. Why couldn't we have stayed in our old house? Things aren't much different here. My cage is the same and all the same furniture and other things are here, so I'm not sure what we gained by all that moving. Well, one thing is different. My person's person is here all the time. I think he's my step-person now. Anyhow, I get to sit on his shoulder all day. It's really fun!

Out for a Walk

Finally, I went outside for a walk in my carrier the other day -- the first time this summer. I have mixed feelings about going out in my carrier. Of course, if my person is outside, then I want to be there, too. And I like listening to the outside birds' songs and all the other interesting sounds. But then there are those predatory cars and trucks that come roaring by. I can never feel 100% certain that one of them isn't going to reach into my carrier and snatch me away. Anyhow, here's a picture of me in my carrier:

What do you think? Does it look safe? Could a predator get in?

Song Birds

I spent some time by the window this morning listening to the outside birds sing their songs. It was very enjoyable. I heard some nice twitters, chirps, and tweets and even contributed a few chirps of my own. I heard nothing as beautiful as a parrots' squawk, of course, but that's not to be expected. They're only song birds, after all.

New Parrot Poetry

It's a Parrot's Life
by Shadow

Sitting on a perch
Foraging in a dish
Sipping from a water bottle
I've got all a bird could wish.

Squawking, beeping, cooing
Chirping at my toys
This is what a parrot loves
Making lots of noise.

Cuddling with my person
Pulling on her hair
I'm safe and happy in my house
I've no need to go out there!

Yawn

It been one of those ho hum days, just waiting around in my cage. My person was out of the house for a lot of the day, and when she was here, she left me in my cage for quite a while. Humph! I would never treat her like that. She's trained me to step on her hand when she says "Step up," but I just can't seem to train her to let me out of my cage and pay attention to me every time I squawk. Not fair!

Rainy Day

It's cold and gray outside, but I'm snuggled up inside with my person, a cup of tea, and some walnuts. I can't think of a better way to spend a rainy spring day. How about you? What do you like to do on rainy days?

A Kitchen En-Counter

I took a little walk around the kitchen counter the other day, something I hadn't done in a while. I was looking forward to visiting with my friends, the coffee pot and the toaster oven. However, things were pretty quiet. The coffee pot was cold and not gurgling at all, so I continued on to the toaster oven. It, too, was cold and dark. I spent sometime staring through its glass window but, alas, no matter how hard I stared, no toast appeared. Too bad. I love a piece of toast. Oh, well, maybe next time.

Parrot Poetry - Sunflower Seed

Sunflower Seed

by Shadow

If you’re looking for a way

To pass an idle hour,

My advice is to reach for

The seed of the sunflower.

Open up the hard black shell,

Inside you’ll find a special treat,

A morsel smooth and tender,

On my tongue it tastes so sweet.

So if you’re feeling bored

And it’s a pastime that you need,

You could not possibly do better
Than to open a sunflower seed.

Bath Time!

Don't you just love baths? They're so much fun. I take a bath every chance I get, even if the only possibility that presents itself is a glass of water.

A Good Cup of Tea

OK, so coffee is nice because I get to listen to the sipping sounds when people drink it, but tea is great because I love drinking it myself. A hot cup of tea is especially nice and cozy on a rainy day like today. But why do people always have to stick a spoon in a tea cup? It just gets in my way!

A Good Cup of Coffee

Do you like coffee? I do. Sipping coffee can really brighten up the day. It's different from tea. When there's a cup of tea around, I like to sit on the rim of the cup, dip my beak in, and lick the little drops of tea off the end of my beak. Whether it's herb tea or black tea, it's a very tasty drink. Coffee, on the other hand, is not so tasty. That's why I let my person do all the tasting. She sips the coffee and I sit on her shoulder and make little sipping and gurgling noises while she drinks. It's really fun. I like anything that makes a good sound, and sipping coffee is one of the funnest sounds I know.

A Friend

I had a nice little chat with the microwave oven today.
"Beep!" said the oven.
"Beep!" I replied.
There's just something about that microwave oven that I feel like I can talk with it in a way that I can't with anyone else. It's important to have friends like that, don't you think?

A Book About Vegetables

OK, my person is at it again, writing a book that is NOT about parrots. This one is a story about growing vegetables, but since I like eating vegetables, I guess I can't complain. I like growing vegetables, too. OK, I like watching my person grow vegetables, and then eating them fresh right out of the garden. Anyhow, you can find out about my person's new book here. It's called "Which Half?" because these two brothers can't figure out which half of the vegetables to eat. Ha ha. It's a really nice story even though it is an ebook so you can't chew the pages. But the words are nice, and the pictures are too.

I love the paper shredder!

I LOVE talking with the paper shredder. It always has so many interesting things to say. Well, OK, it really only says one thing -- Whirr! -- but it sounds so cool when it says it. We have the most fun conversations: Whirr! Squawk! Whirr! Squawk! Whirr! Squawk! The only problem is that when I try to cozy up to the paper shredder, my person always pulls me away. "That paper shredder has a bite sharper than yours," she tells me. Hmm. I find that hard to believe.

Humph!

So a couple of phone company guys were just here doing some work. It's really exhausting when strangers like that come to the house. I have to keep any eye on them to make sure they don't do anything predatory, keep my feathers fluffed up to enhance my big and tough look, and squawk loudly at regular intervals, just so they know who's boss. And then they have the nerve to ask my person: "Why doesn't she say anything?" What do they think I'm saying with all that squawking? "I'm a big tough parrot so you'd better not try anything!" Of course.

Sheesh!

It's no secret how I feel about those dumb robins and their silly habit of migrating south for the winter when they could stay at home warm and safe in their cages with full food dishes. But since they do migrate, you'd think they'd at least have the sense to stay away until the weather gets warm again. But nooooooo. Yesterday there was a whole flock of them right outside the house, huddled in the tree branches with their feathers all fluffed up against the cold. What were they thinking? That some worms would just pop up out of the frozen ground and say "Eat me"? At least the worms have the sense to stay underground until spring comes. But those robins….sheesh!

It's March, but…….

February is finally over! What a dreary month that was. But, frankly, March isn't looking any better so far. It still looks snowy and icy outside and my person says it's very cold. Well, I've had enough of this silly weather and I think it's time for a change. But nobody listens to me. There's nothing this little green parrot can do but wait around until someone decides to change the weather. Meantime, I'll sit by my food dish and dream of sunny days, sunflowers growing tall in the garden, and morning walks in my carrier. I hope spring comes soon!

Busy, busy, busy

February is almost over and I've hardly posted at all this month.

"What a lazy creature!" I hear you saying. "She's turning from a parrot into a sloth."

You may think I'm living the life of Riley, but the fact is, as a pet parrot I have many duties and responsibilities that keep me busy all day long. It starts in the morning, when I have to make sure my person gets up on time. Usually she does, but just in case she doesn't, I'm always ready to give a few loud squawks to remind her that it's time for her to get up and take care of her responsibilities (number 1 responsibility: feed me). Then I have to sit on her shoulder while she exercises, and after that I have to sit on her shoulder all morning while she works.

At lunch time, my job is to take some of the tastier bits off my person's plate and eat them myself, just to make sure that she doesn't overeat. While I do this, I have to make sure to leave a lot of crumbs lying around so that she will have something to clean up. (Tip: It's really important to keep your people busy, otherwise they get cranky and might cause you some trouble.)

In the afternoon, it's back to sitting on my person's shoulder while she works. And at all times I have to keep an eye out for hawks, cats, scissors, and other predators and warn my person of their presence by squawking loudly and biting her ear. I tell you, I'm always exhausted by the end of the day and am very happy to spend a few quiet moments in my cage nibbling on a seed treat. So you see, it's a miracle I find any time at all to blog. I really enjoy it, though, so thanks for reading!

….and yet another parrot poem

The Parrot's February Lament
by Shadow

I look outside my window
And see the sky so gray,
And ice and snow are all around--
Winter is here to stay.

I care not what the groundhog says
Whether spring is far or near--
I look outside my window
And see that winter is still here.

For now I'm safe and warm inside.
In my cage I've nothing to fear.
I care not what the groundhog says.
I'll just wait for spring to appear.

A New Parrot Poem

Upon My Person's Shoulder
By Shadow

When days are getting short
And nights are getting colder,
I am warm and snug
Upon my person's shoulder.

When predators come near
And I'm needing to feel bolder
I fly to a safe perch
Upon my person's shoulder.

We've passed the years together.
Now that I am getting older,
There's no place I'd rather be
Than on my person's shoulder.

Ho Hum

Things are pretty dreary here in the parrot cage. Most of that scary white snow has been washed away, but it's being replaced by ice and rain, gray skies, chilly air. There's not much to do but snuggle up to my person to stay warm, watch her write, and nip on her ear every time she's eating something that looks delicious, just so she doesn't forget to share some with me (she does forget sometimes). So that's how we're spending these gray winter days over here. How about you?

Vacation…again!

OK, somebody's got to explain this whole vacation thing to me because, frankly, I don't get it. I just got back from vacation and the only word I can think of to describe the experience is BO - RING. I mean, really. My person took me to the neighbor's house and then just left me there. So I spent the whole week just sitting around in my cage eating and chewing and playing, doing all the usual things, but I wasn't at home and I wasn't with my person. So, what was the point of that? And where was my person the whole time? Finally at the end of the week she came to get me and brought me back home and now, thank goodness, everything is back to normal. So that's good, but why did we have to go through that whole "vacation" experience in the first place? Can someone please tell me why people do this?