Back from Vacation

So here's another thing I don't get -- vacations. I just returned from one and I'm left feeling: "Huh?" Not that I had a bad time or anything. My person dropped me off at Trouble's house, where I sat around in my cage for a week wondering why I was there. Trouble's person fed me melons and grapes (which, by the way, my own person almost NEVER feeds me at home), so that part was good. But the rest was rather ho hum. I just stayed in my cage and chewed and squawked and did all the usual things. So, aside from those melons and grapes, I'm wondering why people think vacations are such a big deal. They're not much different from staying home. I don't know where my person was all week. I'm guessing at someone else's house eating melons and grapes.

Spring Migrants

The migratory birds are coming back, and while I'm happy to have so many noisy tweety birds around, I have to wonder...what's the point? That whole migration business seems like a big waste of time to me. I know I've blogged about this before, but I still don't get it. Those migratory birds fly thousands of miles just so they can spend the winter in a warm place with a lot of food. Well, I do the same thing, and I don't have to fly anywhere to do it. I just stay in my nice warm cage and let my person keep my food dish full. I don't know why those other birds don't do the same. Seems a lot easier to me. Sure, I can't go outside all winter, but so what? Outside isn't always so great anyhow. There are lots of predators and big scary cars and other unpleasant things out there. So, personally, I can't see that migration brings any great benefits that are worth the trouble of all that flying.

Obedience

I've posted this request before, but I need to ask again: Does anyone have any tips for training my person? Sometimes it's just so hard to get her to listen, no matter how loudly I squawk. So the other day after she was poking around my cage with the vacuum cleaner, as if that wasn't bad enough, she took my cage off its shelf, then shook out the cloth that covers the shelf. So of course when she tried to put the cloth back I had to walk all around it and chew and poke just to make sure everything was all right. She kept telling me to get out of the way so she could put everything back straight.  She said, "It's just a cloth." Just a cloth! I can't seem to make her understand that once she puts something close to my cage, next to it or underneath it, then it becomes my territory, and I am bound by the parrot code to do everything possible to protect my territory. And that vacuum cleaner! I don't know why she can't keep that nasty roaring thing in the closet where it belongs, or better yet, get it out of the house entirely. But every time I try to suggest this, she just tells me to stop squawking and biting. Sheesh! So if anyone can help me out with any person training tips, I would really appreciate it.

Happy Hatch Day to Me!!

My hatch day is coming up very soon and today I received the most wonderful hatch day gift from my person's aunt. Does that make her my aunt too? Or my great aunt? Whatever, she certainly is a great aunt! She knows about my telephone book shredding talents, so she sent me the perfect gift -- a telephone book to shred! I know this is a telephone book I will really enjoy shredding. By the way, in case you are wondering, I am about to turn 16. That makes me a very wise and experienced parrot indeed.

Parrot Poetry: The Birds of Spring

The Birds of Spring
by Shadow

The chickadee goes chi-chi-chi,
The robin goes chirrup,
But no bird sings as beautifully
As a parrot with its squawk.

Caw and quack and tweet and chirp
Is how the other birds talk,
But no bird sounds as lov-e-ly
As a parrot with its squawk.

Telephones

Do you have telephones in your house? We do, and I think they're just wonderful. First of all, whenever one gets dialed, it makes the most interesting beeping noises, and I beep right along with them. Also, my person talks to the telephone frequently, and I just love the sound of her voice when she does that. I snuggle up under her chin and chirp and coo while she talks. Last night while we were
doing this, the telephone started talking to me! It said, "Hi, Shadow. Pretty bird. Pretty bird." So I said "Pretty bird" right back to it! Then I noticed the buttons on the phone and reached out my beak to chew one, but before I could get even one bite, my person moved the phone away. Then she put me in my cage. Hmmmph! I keep thinking about all those delicious buttons just waiting to be chewed. One day I'll find a way to get my beak on them. You'll see. Anyhow, I just love telephones and I think every house should have at least one.

Table Manners

OK, that gray parrot, Trouble, may know how to talk, but she doesn't know how to eat right. She has no table manners at all. My person let her come to the breakfast table the other day and what you think she did? She just stuck her beak in the cereal bowl and started flinging cereal all over the place. Me, I never fling. When I eat cereal, I let the crumbs drop to the floor, and when I am done nibbling on a piece, I let that drop to the floor, too, before I pick up another one. That's what floors are for. Duh.