Thursday, June 23, 2011

Summer Job

I’ve been enjoying the summer so far, chewing up books and popsicle sticks indoors when it’s raining, and going outdoors for walks in my carrier when the weather is nice. But, I’ve been thinking maybe it’s time to stretch a bit, and a summer job might not be a bad idea. After all, my talents are many. Here are some jobs I think I would be good at:

Office Paper Shredder – I can chew through all your discarded office paper and sensitive documents in no time at all, even including documents you hadn’t considered throwing away. And, unlike your shredding machine, I do it all without electricity. I am a “green” shredding machine in more ways than one.

Doorbell – I will sit by your front door and squawk at the top of my voice anytime anyone comes near it.

Housecleaner – If you give me a nice dish to bathe in, I will splash the water all around, even as high as the ceiling. Then all you have to do is take a dry rag and wipe and –voila!- your room is clean. Also, if you drop crumbs on the floor, I will gladly pick them up for you.

Dog/Cat Scarer – If you are having problems keeping your dog or cat off the furniture while you are out, I can sit in your living room and squawk anytime the dog or cat comes near. Believe me, it will stay far away.

If you know of anyone who is looking to hire someone for one of these positions, please have them contact me. Or if you know about any other kind of job I might be good at, let me know. Thanks!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Bird Food

Those outside birds have some interesting eating habits. It’s not all robins pulling up worms. There are also those hummingbirds sipping nectar from flowers. Then there’s the catbird that sits in the shrubbery eating berries. And the other day while my person and I were looking out the window, a blue jay swooped down and grabbed a bug right out of the grass in front of us. Hmmm, I don’t think that would taste very good. I think apples and cereal and pellets are much tastier. Later in the summer, the goldfinches will start eating seeds off the evening primrose plants. They’ll also probably start stealing seeds from the sunflowers in the garden, like they always do. That really makes me mad because those sunflowers are mine. My person grows them for me, so I can have seeds to eat in the winter. Well, I guess I don’t mind sharing a few sunflower seeds with those dumb finches, but just a few.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Listening to the Birds

I like sitting by the window and listening to the outside birds. They make all sorts of interesting sounds. Of course, there are those dumb robins who are up before dawn with their “cheerio cheerio,” and they keep on singing after dark, too. They just don’t know when to be quiet! There are lots of chickadees around with their cute little voices, “Hi, sweetie! Hi, sweetie!” Chickadees are nice because they don’t leave when the weather gets cold like lots of other birds, but stay around singing “Hi, sweetie” all winter, too. Then there is a phoebe living next door that complains all day long, “Fee bee, fee bee,” with its raspy voice. I still haven’t figured out what it’s complaining about. We also have a catbird that likes to sit on the clothesline post and mew. So there are lots of interesting bird noises outside, but none of those outside birds can say “pretty bird” or beep like a microwave oven or squawk as beautifully as a parrot.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Hummingbirds

My person and I have enjoyed watching the hummingbirds this spring, but we haven’t seen any humming around the feeder for most of this week. At first we were worried, then we started seeing them in the garden sipping nectar from the irises. I guess now that the flowers are blooming, they would rather eat in the garden. Probably nectar tastes better than the sugar water in the feeder, so I guess that makes sense. Personally, I would rather eat out of my feeder. I mean, it’s right there in my cage and it always has food in it, so whenever I feel hungry, I just go over there and start eating. It’s much more convenient than flying around a garden poking your beak in and out of flowers. I guess that’s why I’m a parrot and not a hummingbird.